Graue Wolken or
Gray Clouds is actually a song from a German Group called Blumfeld. They used to play it a lot in my favorite cafe, but now it´s not popular anymore, so they only play it every once in a while, when there is absolutely no one else around to hear it.
After reading Sergio´s blog, I´m trying to figure out which kind of rules I could use for my life. I wonder what kind of person I could be, given my possibilities and the ever changing fortune. It´s sad to see that some people spent their youth chasing some kind of dream that, back then seemed really important, and, in a blink, ten years have passed, and now whatever it was doesn´t seem important anymore. At a certain age it seems there is not so much to change, and there is a mixture of despair and resignation as the spectrum of probabilities shrinks and shrinks. When you are young you could do a lot, if you are smart then it´s even better, you can go to a nice University and finish it, and then may be get a good job where you can make money, or career, or realise your dream, or whatever, then maybe have a family, and then have a golden age at the end of your life, having some one there with you, until you pass out. Or follow an alternative life path, that somehow society manages to push you.
But when you couldn´t finish your studies, or couldn´t even afford them ... when you married and your life was hell, so you had to divorce, again or again, or weren´t even able to find someone in the first place, and that in spite of always doing the right thing, being nice, faithful and true ... when you were kicked out of your job, or whatever ... your possibilities are reduced.
So, you spent your energies in a (sorry, my fellow physicists) non-conservational way, only to find out that the world is a human pyramid where everyone desperately tries to climb on top of the others (as the poor bastards at the base sink in a pool of lava), you don´t look down, but you begin to feel the smell of something burning.
